Inside the world of an autistic girl, essay 1: The pathologising of coping behaviours

I thought I would begin this journal with some essays about autistic people, and the way we are treated in society. As an autistic person, activism about this is a big thing for me, and, one of the reasons to have this journal is to keep all these essays in a more tidy place than Tumblr, but, I thought I might start to write some original ones too.

So, here is one about coping behaviours, and how they are pathologised in autistic people.

Warning: triggers for abuse of autistic children.


Almost everyone has some behaviours that they use to cope with stress. I'm not very familiar with neurotypical ways to cope with stress, but, from reading a lot of books and knowing people who are not autistic, I get the idea that common neurotypical ways to cope with stress are things like:

• smoking a cigarette, having a small drink of alcohol, or some similar thing
  
• going for a run
  
• taking a warm bath (I like this one too)
  
• watching a movie
  
• listening to some music
  
• calling or texting your friends
  
• playing with an animal
  
• punching a pillow

...etc.

I want you to take a moment, think of the ways that you personally cope with stress. Particularly if you are neurotypical, or, your neurodiversity is not related to the ways you cope. Think of the little things you do to help you get through the day, that are harmless, or, if they do a slight harm (like smoking), it's something you are happy to trade for a little relief from the stressy, busy world. Make a little list on some paper if you like. Don't continue this, until you think about it for just a few moments.

Are you done? Okay.

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Inside the world of an autistic girl, essay 2: Boundary violation culture

This essay is going to introduce an idea that I really think is important. I talked about it on Tumblr, but, I want to write into a more formal essay too.

Warning: because of the topic of this essay, it may trigger for abuse of autistic children, rape culture/rape, and issues of ignoring a person's boundaries in general, including: boundaries of trans* people, people of colour, women and people choosing to use pseudonyms.


A lot has been said about rape culture, which is a phrase used to describe the ways that the society (usually US society, in the discussions) excuses and contributes to rape, by being a place where victims are often blamed, having double standards for men and women in a sexual way, etc. I don't really feel like I am the best person to describe rape culture: a quick look at the idea is here.

It's interesting, I never looked at that page before, but, at the end, bell hooks is mentioning that that rape culture is in fact part of a larger, "culture of violence". I am going to put a similar theory here, and suggest that what we have in US society in fact, is a larger culture of boundary violation.

Boundary violation, it means not respecting people's personal boundaries, and, creating a culture where "playful" violating those boundaries is normal. Boundary violation culture is about people thinking they have a right to touch you, to have particular kinds of response from you to their words and actions, or to poke into your private life with conversation questions. It's obvious to see where it would be a part of encouraging rape. But, it's not just about rape.

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swan+girl: why identity doesn't clash

Prompt from kinspeak on Tumblr:

To otherkin and therians alike, how do you think your personalities tie in with your kin-type or therio-type? Does the “human” side of you clash with the “other”? Or do they fit seamlessly together?

For me, they perfectly match.

Which is not saying that I never have more “human” feelings that clash with the “swan” feelings, but… I don’t think this is a deep clash between the girl and the swan, because, I sometimes have human feelings that clash with my other human feelings, and, swan feelings that clash with my other swan feelings. That’s a part of being alive, that your feelings don’t always match.

But, it’s not a daily war between the swan and the girl. The girl is like the swan, swan-like, sometimes gentle to those she loves, sometimes cold and distant, and the swan is like the girl, girl-like, sometimes expressing her self in ways that are not like a swan at all. Most of the time, I don’t know where one ends and the other begins, and, it seems wrong to try and pull them apart, because, they are meant to be whole.

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How to help birds

This is just some informations that I think people in the world should know. If you are capable to read the links without being triggered, it just takes a few minutes of time so please, educate your self if you can.

Parrots

- If you are thinking of getting a parrot, watch this short video first. It's just the truths of parrot ownership, good and bad.

- SOAR - Supporters of Avian Rights [content on this website contains animal abuse, might be very painful to look at]

Please read this site:
* before buying a bird from a pet store
* if you know about a place or person where birds are being neglected
* if you want to be educated on the problems of captive breeding parrots
* if you believe that animal cruelty laws in the US should cover pet birds

- If you want to get a parrot, please opt to adopt! Then take a look at ParrotFeather.com to learn about the good and bad of keeping different types of parrot species, to find the right bird for you.

- Support No Feather Left Behind adoption and rescue work with these pendants!

Swans

- Please keep your dogs on a leash in swan habitats, especially in the breeding season (between March and May). Breeding swans will defend their mates very strongly and there may be a fight. They will hurt your dog, and, your dog will hurt them. Dogs are responsible for many swan deaths, and, swans can kill your beloved dog too... please be a responsible pet owner/animal companion!

- How to feed swans: don't feed them bread! Read here for healthy advice on how to feed swans, geese and ducks. Here is a quick list of good ideas: "greens cut up into small pieces; healthy popcorn (without artificial coloring and flavorings); corn / cracked corn; whole wheat GRAIN (not processed, not bread - natural state grain); whole oats; brown rice, lentils, split peas and smallish seeds". Please only feed a small amount, don't make them rely on people for food.

- Before you support killing of mute swans because they are "invasive species", or, believe (good meaning, but, not complete) arguments you read on the internet and even many good meaning conservation sites about this: read about another view here.

If that essay is too long, there is also a good one here by the Michigan State University College of Law, a quote from it is here:

The MDNR claimed it was "joined by mainstream conservation groups that understand the need to reduce the exploding mute swan population" and that only "a small band of wacky fringe groups" trying "to make a buck" were opposing the effort to kill swans. [...]

Moreover, it appears that only the "wacky fringe groups" bothered to look into the science. Scientific validation of the claim that mute swans are responsible for anything other than negligible damage to the ecosystem of the Chesapeake Bay is conspicuous in its absence.

If you want to know what you can do, please, tell others about this, and, sign petitions at savemuteswans.org or muteswantruth.ca (different petitions).

- Adopt a trumpeter swan and help to protect these rare birds!

Other

Put these posters up in your local park to protect birds from harm by six-pack rings and kite string.